Healing PTSD: 4 Ways to Support the Healing Process

Ever since we moved to Florida I get sick much more often and the colds last much longer than when we lived in New York City. I’m not sure why this is, except that it can be 80 degrees outside and 60 degrees inside most establishments, so your own thermostat is constantly being jerked around and sometimes, the transition just isn’t smooth.

The upside of these little colds is that they force me to slow down and give me more time to read. Last weekend was one of those weekends when I pulled the chaise lounge on my balcony into the sun and just tried to recuperate. While I did that, I read Wayne Dyer’s book, THE POWER OF INTENTION. I’ve referenced Dyer before, but it’s been piecemeal. My own introduction to him has been through his PBS lectures. He’s a dynamic speaker, but this is the first time I’ve ever sat down with him for more than a few minutes.

I decided to read THE POWER OF INTENTION to see if Dyer had any insights that would apply to how PTSDers need to access this internal source of healing. Lo and behold, he did! Today, reduced from all of Dyer’s ideas, a brief outline on the top four ways to support the healing process:

1 – Become indifferent to doubt. I’ve written about 4 ways to boost belief in your ability to heal . Here’s the crux of why it matters: Dyer says, “When doubt is banished… anything is possible. We all… use our thoughts to create the world we choose. If you doubt your ability to create the life you intend, then you’re refusing the power of intention.” The strength of our intention to heal is the foundation for our success. We cannot allow any cracks. (Later next week I’ll write more on this.)

2 – Remain confident that through reliance on your imagination your assumptions will materialize. According to Dyer, “… if we focus on what’s ugly, we attract more ugliness into our thoughts, and then into our emotions, and ultimately into our lives.” But if we use our imagination to focus on positive, healing and supportive thoughts – if we use our imagination to conjure the new person we wish to become – then we bring these things into our world. If the power of intention is the driving force of healing, the power of imagination is the fuel for that force. Give yourself permission to imagine the new you. Get into the habit of daydreaming. Let your imagination run wild!

3 – Reconnect to intention. Dyer writes, “When life appears to be working against you, when your luck is down, when the supposedly wrong people show up, or when you slip up and return to old, self-defeating habits, recognize the signs that you’re out of harmony with intention.” This whole month we’ve been working with the idea of intention as a way to kickstart the healing process. Dyer describes seven faces of intention and says the utilization of each aspect deepens and further supports the power of it. Those seven faces are: creativity, kindness, love, beauty, expansion, unlimited abundance, receptivity.

4 – Imagination is your new strategy. Dyer teaches, “Act as if anything you desire is already here. Believe … all that you seek you’ve already received, that it exists… and know you shall have your desires filled.” In the midst of PTSD it’s hard, so very hard, to imagine we will ever be whole and happy and well again. But look around you. There are people who heal every day, not only from PTSD but from much more horrible mental and physical illnesses. If they can do it, so can you. Practice the daily exercise of imagining the end result of every step of the healing process. Dyer calls this ‘thinking from the end’, an exercise I’ll elaborate on next week.

Sometimes, we all just need to take an hour (or two or three or ten!) to pause, to stop the busyness and make a space in which to think. This has been a busy BRIDGE THE GAP week. There’s a lot of work to do. Find a patch of sun somewhere. Pull a chair into it. Give yourself the space to work through this week’s exercises. Give yourself the gift of imagining who you will be when you have banished PTSD forever.

(photo: Will Fuller)

Healing PTSD, Resolution #1: Defining What We Want, Part One

So, now that your face is warmed up and you’ve spent some time forging the first small attempt to physically reconnect with your untraumatized self, let’s talk about the crux of who that self is.

It is not possible to survive trauma and remain unchanged – we all know that. But the truth is, we’re all changing all the time anyway. Trauma just makes us notice it in a bigger, more calamitous way. But think back for a minute. Are you exactly the same person you were at age 5? Age 25? Age (fill in the appropriate number)? The answer is, NO. We are always evolving in subtle ways, sometimes so imperceptibly we don’t even notice, but the truth is, while there is a core self, there’s also an evolutionary self. Our inner life is sort of like the solar system: there’s a constant sun, and then planets that revolve around it. In PTSD our solar system has been swallowed by a Black Hole, but somewhere in another galaxy the sun still exists and our goal is to get back into orbit around it.

Deepak Chopra explains it this way:

“I” never goes. Only “I am this or that” goes. Ultimately, enlightenment is for you to always be grounded in "I," but the limited, "I am this or that," goes.

You had a sense of "I" when you were a baby. You had a sense of "I" when you were a teenager. You have a sense of "I" now. You'll have a sense of "I" when you are an old person. But, in each of these cases that sense of "I" will be identifying itself with a different person. The baby's not the person you're in now. You have a different body, different ego, different personality, different thoughts, and a different way of looking at the world.

The problem with trauma is the shock. Rather than changing gradually from a child to a teen, we change in an instant from powerful to powerless. Over the course of any trauma, lasting one day or over several years, we can all think of at least one moment in which we felt ourselves violated and so immediately altered for the worse.

But we are mutable beings, with free will – we do not have to remain stuck in this altered, sad, horrible state. We can choose to alter again, this time for the better. The question is, How? While the answer and the path vary for each of us, the core for all of us is the same:

In order to revamp ourselves, we need to get back to basics, to know ourselves again. But not our traumatized selves. We know those all too well! Instead, we need to pull aside the curtain of PTSD and see who’s huddling behind there. What is his or her desire? Knowing who we are has a lot to do with knowing what we want. Which has a lot to do with healing and moving on to live a joyful, productive life.

Desire is defined as:

To want strongly; the feeling that accompanies an unsatisfied state; hope: expect and wish; an inclination; a natural state of longing.

You have those feelings over a lot of things. This week, as part of the BRIDGE THE GAP healing process we’re going to focus on reclaiming your desire.

First, we turn our attention to what those desires are in the PTSD state.

Today, let’s flex your desire muscle by getting a clear picture of all of the PTSD desires you have. We all walk around with this summary wish: I want not to feel this way. But let’s flesh that out a little.

Make a list of what you want that is PTSD related. For example:

I want the past to let me go.
I want the nightmares to stop.
I want the flashbacks to end.
I want to sleep through the night.
I want to not be so anxious.

I know I haven’t tapped out your daily PTSD-related desires. Add 10 more ‘wants’ to this list. And then keep going! I used to teach creativity and writing. One of my favorite exercises with my students was to give them a prompt and a time limit and then let them just free flow their ideas. The first things that come out are at the top of your consciousness, but the really interesting things surface when you’ve tapped the easy stuff and then keep on going.

When you have some time today, sit down with paper and pen. At the top of the page write, ‘PTSD things I want to be rid of’. Then set a timer for 5 minutes and write all of the PTSD symptoms and experiences and thoughts you want to end, be rid of and eliminate. Don't worry about or check spelling, punctuation, grammar, etc. Do not edit your thoughts for brilliance or stupidity. There is no right or wrong here; there is only your voice on the page.

When the 5 minutes is up, take a highlighter and read through what you’ve written; highlight the desires that seem most important. This can be all or just a few.

Now, set the timer again and finish this sentence: ‘I want to be rid of these things because….’

It’s not only important to know what we want, but why we want it. Understanding ourselves deepens and supports our intentions, which helps us focus so they can be achieved.

We spend so much time silently suffering, suppressing our desires, tamping down our personalities just so we can cope. Today, let your personality stretch itself a little, give it some exercise. Freeing ourselves from PTSD means freeing ourselves from everything about it. Give those suppressions a voice. I can hear them; they’re calling you.

(photo: tyla’75)

Healing PTSD, Resolution #1: 4 Ways to Boost Belief in Your Ability to Heal

1 – Believe in the power of your own mind. Get hip to the idea of quantum physics and its ability to support healing. I know, I know, QM sounds freaky, but it’s really an everyday occurrence and we lay people ought to know how (and that) it works. On the most simple level, I’m talking about using the power of your own mind to boost your belief in your ability to heal. Quantum physics is a branch of science that deals with discrete units of energy (like, say, your thoughts) and how those tiny units of energy can effect big things. This article from Kirsten Harrell explains this idea and how it relates to the power of intention.

2 – Take some time to think about your ability to heal. Check out this ‘Believe You Will Succeed’ exercise by Nick Best. My discovery of his process began with an article he wrote called ‘Developing Self-Belief – The 10 Step Process’, which I thought laid out a great foundation for the development of belief in anything we hope to achieve, including PTSD healing. But then I read on and found that Best had actually devised a more deep and expanded process for getting down to our core beliefs and reinforcing them. Take some time to work it through as a way to bolster your healing intention!

3 – Get familiar with the fact that people self-recover from mental illness every day. It’s time to do some reading! And time to admit you are not unique, special or terminally chained to PTSD. The National Empowerment Center has tons of information and resources for healing mental illness -- not treating, but HEALING. As in, it can be done! Recovery, Inc. also offers a program and mindset that believes in the power of us to heal ourselves. Both organizations have good reading material as well as local options to support your healing adventure. On both sites you will find proof that regular people – that would include you – recover from serious mental illness all the time. Their secret? They choose to, and then they make the effort!

4 – Get a sense of humor. We have more strength to believe in the possibilities of what we can achieve when we’re happy, when we laugh, when we are amused. Staying stuck in our depression only further supports our belief that we cannot heal – a belief that is false. In order to support and enhance the belief that you can heal, you’ll have to actively take some time to lighten up your perspective. As you’ll see in this clip, ‘Medical Benefits of Laughter’ only 15 minutes of laughter a day can positively affect your physical body, which in turn affects your mental self, power and strength. Think I’m kidding about this? There is actually a model of therapy called ‘Laughter Therapy’ as you’ll see demonstrated in this clip. (It’s crazy enough to make you giggle just watching it.) But seriously, start to look for things to make you laugh. Watch a funny movie. Listen to a side-splitting comedian. Get into the habit of reconnecting to that self that thinks there is humor in the world; it’s also that self that contains hope, resilience and the ability to heal PTSD.

(photo: Steve Grunberger)

PTSD Healing Resolution #1: The Top 2 Things You Need to Heal

So, here we are in 2009; the beginning of a year when our desire to heal and our deliberate participation in our own PTSD healing is going to move us closer to relief.

Let’s get to it. Resolution #1 on our list of Healing PTSD Resolutions: I will create a powerful healing intention.

When we embark on the road to healing PTSD there are two most important elements we need with us to create a powerful healing intention:

#1 – belief in ourselves

#2 – belief in our ability to heal

These two things combined and focused create the compelling intention, I will use my internal power to heal my PTSD.

Do you feel a deep belief in these two areas? If not, it’s time to focus on shoring them up. They will be the crux of how and when you achieve healing.

As in everything about PTSD healing, these two elements are ones we have to manufacture ourselves. We must have a deep, unswerving belief in what we want to achieve. We must put the desire to be PTSD-free, to live fully without the stain of experience, back into our daily thoughts.
Two years ago my mother gave me a book entitled, THE LAW OF ATTRACTION, by Esther and Jerry Hicks. First of all let me just say, I’m not a woo-woo kind of person. I was skeptical of the book, but my mother’s not a frivolous person and she did so much over the years to cheerlead and champion my PTSD healing. So, in the spirit of her intention I opened the book – and nearly closed it when the first 30 pages of introduction just seemed a little too far out of the cosmos for me.

But then I got to the first chapter called, ‘An Introduction to Being Well-Being,’ and I thought, All right… I like that. I want to be well. So, I kept reading and was swept up in the book when I came upon two Laws that actually seemed useful:

Eternal Universal Law #1 is: Law of Attraction: That which is unto itself, is drawn. “Because the Law of Attraction is responding to the thoughts that you hold at all times, it is accurate to say that you are creating your own reality.” (Italics those of the authors.)

We bring to ourselves what we think about. In order to bring healing we must, in every moment, think about and believe it its possibility, truth and achievement. Everything we do, say, think, desire must support the belief in our ability to achieve wellness.

Eternal Universal Law #2 is: Science of Deliberate Creation: That which I give thought to and that which I believe or expect – is. "When you understand the power of thought and practice your deliberate offering of it, you will discover the powerful leverage (in creating) that only comes from desiring…. When you … positively anticipate with your thoughts, the amount of action required is far less, and the action is much more satisfying. If you do not take the time to align your thoughts, far more action is required, without the satisfying results."

The power of our intentions can reap results. The more we imagine ourselves being healed and use all of our thoughts toward that goal, the more quickly that becomes our reality, and the more easily we will achieve it.

When I finished the book I was inspired by the ideas, but I didn’t know what to do with them. So, life went on and I didn’t think about the book at all as other things replaced it in my intention. But not long afterward I really dropped everything in my life that did not support, enhance or encourage my PTSD healing. My sole focus became proactively developing a mindset and experiences for healing. Within six months I was PTSD-free. Coincidence? Maybe. I’d already done a lot of work in trauma therapy and in my personal quest to construct a post-trauma identity, so I was primed for the last steps of healing. But maybe those two laws burrowed their way into my subconscious and were noodling around in there, giving added support to my own pursuit of joy which was, in its primitive state, my version of combining laws 1 and 2.

Think about the two Universal Laws today. How can you incorporate them into your own thoughts? Here’s an inspirational video to get you going. For the rest of the day take your own pulse: measure the depth of your belief in yourself and your ability to heal. The next two BRIDGE THE GAP posts will explore how to strengthen these beliefs.

We have the power to transform our lives – no matter what has traumatized and transformed us. That power is available to us today and every day. We must only choose to use it.

(photo: Loving Earth)

PTSD Healing: 12 Resolutions for 2009

Happy New Year! And welcome to a year when you can choose how your PTSD healing will progress.

To walk beside you in your quest for wellness, beginning today PARASITES OF THE MIND will feature 3 weekly posts directly geared toward prescriptive PTSD healing methods – that is, things you can do to proactively enhance your healing experience.

In addition, 3 other weekly posts will continue to address PTSD issues of awareness, education, treatment and healing (plus whatever else seems relevant!).

So, let’s dive in. The following list of resolutions are designed to build upon each other to fortify your healing focus and help you visualize the totally healed you. Drawn from my own healing experience, these are the 12 actions that finally brought me to where I am today - PTSD-free and lovin' it.

BRIDGE THE GAP: 12 PTSD Healing Resolutions

#1 – I will create a powerful healing intention.

#2 – I will talk.

#3 – I will reach out.

#4 – I will educate myself.

#5 – I will educate those around me.

#6 – I will seek help.

#7 – I will actively change my unhealthy perceptions.

#8 – I will deliberately construct a post-trauma identity.

#9 – I will set healing goals.

#10 – I will do whatever it takes to be PTSD-free.

#11 – I will do at least one thing per day toward my healing.

#12 – I will seek joy.

Have a resolution you’d like to add to the list? Leave a comment.

Got a PTSD issue you’d like to see addressed in a post? Feel free to suggest it by contacting me: parasitesof.themind (at) yahoo (dot) com.

Let’s heal together, and then spread the word that PTSD is treatable and curable.

If you’re still not convinced I’m right about this whole possibility of healing idea, I’ll leave you with this quote from Dr. David Baldwin’s fabulous website, Trauma Information Pages:

If we "know" there can't be a cure, we'll never find out if we were wrong. That is the danger I see in arguing "Why there can be no cure for PTSD".

I’m an ex-New Yorker; for many years the motto for our beloved Mets was ‘Ya Gotta Believe’. And so do you.

(photo: mrzeising)

HOW TO MAKE A PTSD NEW YEAR RESOLUTION: Give it Some Real, Deep Thought

So, yesterday I talked about the idea of New Year Resolutions and how they can help focus us on our path to healing. And I referred to my resolution 2 years ago that got me where I am today.

But I’ll let you in on a secret: there was a big problem with my 2007 New Year Resolution: I didn’t know how to fulfill it. It was, after all, pretty vague. Just resolving that within the next year ‘I will be finished with this’ is not exactly a clear statement that puts you on a healing path to getting rid of PTSD.

Luckily, I stumbled into how to achieve my resolution when I danced, which led me to the decision to pursue joy. But your decision to become PTSD-free doesn’t have to (shouldn’t!) be so vague. In fact, according to www.Mygoals.com, a web site geared toward helping define and achieve goals, the clearer your goal the better. This article entitled “Making New Year Resolutions Count” explains the 4-step process to creating the right goals, including this tip: “Give some thought to what you really want and why you want it. What direct benefits do you hope to receive? Identifying the "why" helps you avoid setting goals for the wrong reasons.”

That, ahem, directly supports my suggestion yesterday about the lists you can make about the present so you can see exactly how you want to change the future.

Need some professional help in crafting your resolution? Check out this article – at the end of the piece are links to an online counseling center that offer resolution advice, including a FREE ONLINE THERAPY forum and online counseling to help you set your goals.

Chafing at the idea of homework? Don’t know/want/understand how to craft a healing PTSD resolution? Don’t worry – on New Years Eve I’ll post a list of 12 healing PTSD resolutions for 2009. Then, each month during the new year we’ll address one intention through a series of posts that explore the resolution and offer proactive ways to initiate achieving it.

But don’t just rely on me to do all the work. As I’ve discussed several times, each of us must participate in our own healing; we must feed the desire to be well. That’s the only way healing will be achieved.

So, it’s Sunday, a good day to relax, reflect and reconsider how you will live the upcoming year. Get to it! Freedom is not far away.


(photo: dark and broody)

How to Heal PTSD: A Guide for Healing in 2009

The countdown to 2009 IS ON! And the question is, What are you going to do to make 2009 a better PTSD year than 2008?

In 2009 I’ll be adding some weekly features to support you in this goal. They will include prescriptive and proactive healing measures. Designed to build throughout the year, these BRIDGE THE GAP tips, ideas, and activities will structure a healing process to supplement whatever you’re already doing. Whether you’re in therapy or out, on medication or off, you can implement this BRIDGE THE GAP process to further explore, examine and progress your path to wellness.

We can begin the process with a New Year Resolution, which can help focus your intention on healing. I know this from experience. Two years ago on New Years Eve 2007 I made a resolution that I was going to kick PTSD in the upcoming year. And I did it, which means you can, too. After more than 25 horrible PTSD years I decided to find a way to end all of the nightmares, insomnia, flashbacks, etc. ALL OF IT. I’d had enough. It took me the full year, but I achieved wellness just within the 2008 deadline.

We can't approach PTSD healing as if it can or must be done quickly. A full year is not a bad timeframe in which to consider shedding our PTSD identity and getting on with our lives as someone else. I got together with Holly, a colleague, this week to talk about PTSD support groups. We're about to start one in our local area. Holly is a family counseling therapist and made this interesting statement, "It's important for anyone healing from trauma not to see him or herself as a victim. You are not 'a victim of abuse'; you are 'dealing with the aftermath of abuse'. The difference is that the first label covers the whole person for a limitless time; the second applies to only a part of the person for a limited period of time." And now, it's time for that limited period to end. Healing can be a slow process, but it must be one that does progress. Over the next 4 days let's get focused.

To begin today, take some time to think about what you would like to change about your PTSD experience in 2009. Did I hear you say, Everything! Yeah, believe me, I know. But that’s not good enough. When we want to make a change, we need to be specific. We need to be clear in our intention. Remember I recently wrote about the importance of intention? Now is the time to make it count!

In order to make your intentions fully weighted, it helps to think in specifics. To really focus yourself toward PTSD healing, make some lists so that you are fully aware of PTSD and all its manifestations in your life – not just in the fog of coping with it, but in knowing, recognizing and understanding its impact.

For example, make a list of:

1. all your PTSD symptoms

2. all the reasons you hate PTSD

3. all the reasons you want to hold onto PTSD; all the benefits you see in keeping it

4. all the ways PTSD gets in the way of living a full, happy life

5. all the things you would/could do if PTSD was no longer a part of your life.

Really take some time to get these lists fleshed out. See if you can do a Top 5 or Top 10 outline for each. Tomorrow I’m going to post about designing New Year Resolutions; the more details we have to work with the easier crafting a reasonable Healing PTSD Resolution will be.

(photo: swiv)

Phases of Healing PTSD, Part 5: The Power of Intention

One more thought in this healing PTSD series. In order to learn any new skill – in order do anything, to achieve anything – we start with an intention. We want something, we have the desire for it and commit to having, getting, finding that thing which we desire.

Healing PTSD follows the same path. My challenge to you today is to rate your intention. Is it strong or weak, wild or mild?

In my own history, there were many years I actively sought relief from the symptoms, but I had no specific healing intention. Or rather, my intention was for someone else to heal me, some doctor, therapist, practitioner – whoever! – it was up to them to make me well. I had nothing to do with it. I presented myself in their offices and let them do their thing. Needless to say, my healing was minimal and my journey long.

However, when I finally determined that I WOULD BE HEALED – well then, everything changed. Within a year I made incredible progress and was living a much better life. I am not unique. You can do this, too. My healing did not begin until I actually took on the intention myself. Have you?

Recently I wrote an article for MilitaryWriters.com. In 'Ideas for Healing Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder' I make the point that the crux of healing is what we do for ourselves. Which means, intention is everything.

This weekend, think about how strong your intention is to be well. On a score of 1 to 10 (10 being the strongest) would you say that your intention to heal is Wild or Mild? If it’s wild – meaning you will do whatever it takes to be well, including facing your fears and traumas, learning your truths, reclaiming your self – then you’re ready to achieve wellness and following a proactive path will lead you there.

But if you rate lower than, say, a 10 on the scale of healing intention, you’ve got some work to do! Before you can be well you must WANT to be well with all the power of your bruised and battered soul. You, my friends, must ask yourself why you don’t rate a 10 on the intention scale. What is holding you back? I had a list of a few things that got in my way. If they resonate with you let me know. And then - begin to move beyond them! The biggest hurdle in any achievement is recognizing what’s holding us back. Once we remove those obstacles (by recognizing and then letting them go) we are ready to move forward on our intentions.

For a little inspiration let’s turn to the father of the power of intention, Wayne Dyer. This video should get you fired up. In it, Dyer defines intention as “no matter what gets in the way I intend to make [this] happen”. Sounds like just the attitude we need to heal! Dyer references intention as a pitbull with a tire. I like that image. We have to have that kind of tenacity to heal PTSD. This post-trauma disorder is as strong, durable and flexible as a tire. WE have to be as ruthless, relentless and ­­­­­­­­­­­robust as a pitbull in order to flay this thing to pieces.

I drained my bank account and my emotional reserves chasing cures before I focused my intention. There’s no need for us all to keep making the same mistakes. Today, turn your thoughts toward clearly focusing your intention on healing PTSD. In his video, Dyer says, “You are able to heal yourself.” That’s a powerful statement. It should give us all much hope, but also, much guidance on our path to wellness.

We need to develop a powerful, fiery healing circle of intention both without and within. Dyer says intention is something we connect to. Well then, today’s the day for you to reach out and connect to a source that’s just there, in the air, an energy hovering near you, waiting for you to reach out and connect to it.

Watch this Dyer video. You may not have time to view it in its entirety today, but if you only watch the first 10 minutes it will give you plenty to think about for the rest of the weekend.

And then, as the Nike slogan goes, Just do it. Focus your intention. Take all of the angst and pain and sadness and anger and desperation and funnel it into this one, simple intention. Create that burning desire to heal. Decide nothing can stop you. Your mantra for the rest of the weekend and in all the upcoming days should be, I want to be healed. I want to be healed! Come on, let me hear you chant a few times.

Healing is within our reach, but we do have to stretch for it. Begin today. A new year is approaching. If you have the desire, 2009 can be your year to become PTSD-free.